5 Questions About Masculinity.

1. What does being a man mean to you?

Being a man, to me, means embracing the qualities of life that help me to help other's and create a better world for humanity. Being a man is being human. Therefore, being a man means exploring the diversity of human nature, human characteristics, the whole of human individuality  and not only accepting, but also appreciating the (positive) differences in all cultures including my own. Being a man to me means seeking out a sense of self, and purpose, that isn't bound by the shackles of traditional socialization of masculinity  This means looking within to grow and mature my inner-self. Feeling, and processing emotions. Expressing them properly, and constructively. Not out of anger, and violently like how I've been taught is normal, and tolerable for men to do. Being a man, is about being a human role model. Playing a role that is positive in the perspective of all gender identities, and illustrating this thru my behaviors/actions and my integrity, that all humans are equal. Being a man is about being empathetic, loving, compassionate, caring, (mentally & emotionally) strong, altruistic, and being comfortable enough in your (person-hood) manhood to know when to use your voice, when not to. Developing principles to live by structured around the inclusiveness of equality, justice, and love - are essential to being a (human) man. Being a man is being able to free yourself from the narrowed, limiting, and restrictive societal definition of manhood. 

2. Is the societal perspective on the male role positive or negative? Why?

Both. The privilege of the male role typically goes unseen, because that is how the social system we live in (patriarchal) is set-up to function. Invisibility fuels the perpetuation of male privilege & entitlement; which means men aren't talked about enough in the appropriate context. Highly frequent is the 'downfall' fall of men in media. In the societal perspective with the most recent election in mind, and my feminist ideology -- men have a pretty overall negative perspective in society (not saying this isn't justified). We lack in the parenting department, we lack in emotional competence, we cause unjust violence in our country and start it in other parts of the world, and youth males aren't up to speed in academics. On the other-side there are men who contradict the negativity of manhood  and promotion of traditional masculinity. They are men who reject what patriarchy demands of them without worry of repercussions toward the status of their manhood. Men who are confident, nurturing  respectable men --  are out there working toward the betterment of our nation, the world, but are lacking as being vastly seen in the eye of popular or 'normal' manhood. 

3. What are the most crucial elements to healthy masculinity, and how do we promote them?  Or, do we not need to promote healthy masculinity?

The most crucial elements of healthy masculinity are human elements. Our actions/behaviors toward, and about the world are not defined by our anatomy. The most crucial elements of masculinity are those that prosper, and influence the well-being of other's and self as a whole. Kindness, empathy, compassion, understanding, emotional capacity, and love are all crucial elements to the production of healthy masculinity. If we can centralize the conditioning of our youth around core values & beliefs of equality, justice, and love we can make great strides in opening up the rigid definition of what masculinity is today. 

How do we promote it? Learn it, live it, and teach it. We must make the movement toward healthy masculinity a lifestyle, not a practice. 

4. What are the worst elements of masculinity? How do you feel we change them?

I wouldn't say there is a element of masculinity that is the worst. I do think that society has poorly emphasized the wrong attributes of masculinity as the necessary ones (tough, strong, always in control, dominant, etc.). We must change these by reshaping the idea of what it means to be a man in the lens of social normality. Focusing on the more human qualities of men, and less on the outdated concepts of what makes a man be 'a man'.

5. How do you personally work on your own masculinity to be the best person you can be? Or do you at all?

This is a daily struggle. Unlearning everything that I've been taught, and internalized as what it means to be a man, because it was wrong. I challenge myself to recognize the ways in which I (as a white, heterosexual, able bodied male) provide a path for discrimination, inequality, sexism, racism, and then change the direction I'm headed. For me, it is a journey to find my true inner-self, and to focus on unconditional love of all human beings. Deconstructing the conditioning of a patriarchal mold of maleness isn't an easy task. In fact, for me, it was having the core of my belief system uprooted. Although, at the same-time feeling a huge relief to my being. I try to read as much as I can pertaining to masculinity, discuss masculinity with other males (and/or females), watch lectures, and then reflect inward to measure the areas that are in need of improvement. And, there's always room for improvement, for everyone -- always!!!